Jason (atanas) wrote,
Jason
atanas

srecan swiat bozego narozdenia to all, except the 1 million germans we deported from here

well, poland adventure 2004 is winding down. after what was supposed to be a whirlwind tour, i've actually only seen roughly four cities--poznan (so much of poznan), a charming little village on its outskirts, gdansk and the old czestochowa. i did get to spend a night in warsaw, without any money, so i did see the palace of culture indisputably the finest building in central europe with the exception of all the outlets of TGI Friday's. and my polishness accounts for so much of my behavior: when my adoptive family put butter on their bread, for example, they smeared it on like i smear eurocream on bread. when i went to eat in a milk bar finally yesterday, i got potato pancakes with what i presumed was sour cream. it turned out to be heavy whipping cream, which i could vaguely understand since it's another dairy product, but there was really no reason for the gigantic heap of sugar that they dumped on top of the entire concoction. with my adoptive family, we spent three days talking unendingly about george michael, the neverending story, and about the indefatigably lame biggest basket in the world that they took me to see on christmas (the only time we really deviated from this agenda of conversation topics was when we became excited cuz this guy in the dragon pub, thus named on account of the large papier mache dragon hanging from the roof, was dressed like one of the dudes from the flamboyantly gay romanian pop band o-zone). plus their--i mean, our grandmother--was always reading a magazine about the pope, like i hope to do in my golden years (roughly 22 on), and made senile comments like "all american presidents have turkey for thanksgiving. i bet george bush had a turkey for thanksgiving too. don't you think so?" and for some reason we found this the funniest thing to ever come out of a human voicebox.
the moral of the story is that 'charming old town' is codeword for 'boring conglomeration of uninspired buildings copied from other cities'. zagreb=novi sad=salzburg=munchen=wroclaw=warsaw=poznan=budapest, basically, except there's a bigger castle there. i mean, how many times can you feign excitement to see a building painted a hideous shade of pink by colorblind austro-hungarian architects or their sniveling imitators, maybe with a facade, even a real wooden door. it dawned upon me that my love of stalinist architecture is totally validated when the 'charming old town' of every central european city is more ruthlessly uniform and unoriginal than say a kilometer long building or a 3.32 hectare area concrete collusus in the center of warsaw. you won't see that in every single 'charming old town.'
well, i have to go to katowice, which i can only hope will be highly industrialized enough to be interesting.
long live nowa huta
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i remember when i first saw po land...observing how badly people danced and how assininely they acted, i realised that their really must be a lot of genetic determination involved in what losers we all became.